What to do when your best laid plans aren’t working
We've all probably heard the saying 'best laid plans' before. It's this idea that no matter how much you plan things can still go wrong and you may not end up where you were hoping.
I see this all the time with clients working on their personal, professional, and business goals. Oftentimes when we first set our sights on a new goal we are full of ambition, drive, and momentum. We maybe get a few good weeks in of progress but for some reason or another, we quickly lose steam.
We get discouraged when we get off track or aren't seeing results as quickly as we'd like. Then we maybe give up entirely or self-sabotage in other ways to avoid this difficult part of the growth process.
The good news is that there are ways to reclaim your momentum and get back on track. In fact, this is what I LOVE to work through with clients.
Let's dig into a few different ways I see people's plans not leading to results and what you can do in each scenario to find your momentum again:
When life keeps getting in the way and you de-prioritize your goals so you aren't getting anywhere
I hear this ALL THE TIME from clients and potential clients. They aren't making any progress on their goals because 'life happened' or 'they got busy' or whatever the specific distraction of the week is.
I get it, life happens.
What we can control is how we react in these situations.
If your go-to response when things get busy is to completely de-prioritize yourself, you're right, you won't get anywhere.
What if by continuing to prioritize yourself even when things get busy or life happens, you learn to manage your time better? Or your capacity to be with more things expands? Or by continuing to work out in the mornings you have more energy to deal with the family or work emergency later in the day?
Not everything in life has to be 'this or that.' Consider how things can actually integrate and become an AND conversation.
I can handle whatever life throws at me AND continue making progress on my personal goals.
Maybe it's learning to adjust your plans instead of completely walking away from them. Maybe you can do one small thing the week when life gets crazy instead of something bigger like you originally planned. Consider multiple options instead of just all or nothing.
Reflection: what are ways you can adjust your plan when unexpected things come up? How can you be flexible with yourself without completely going off track or giving up? Write down ideas and keep them handy so when it inevitably happens again you can be prepared.
When you're following someone else's plan of what you should be doing and it's not working
This is something I've had to learn a few times since starting my business. I've joined plenty of programs and trainings learning how to do various parts of my business better.
Yet a lot of times it doesn't work for me like the program promised.
What took me a while to learn is that sometimes when we're blindly following someone else's plan, we may fall into one of several mind traps.
For me, I turn into 'robot Brittany,' AKA my perfectionist alter ego. The plan becomes simply a checklist of things to do and I check them off without much emotion or engagement for why I'm doing it to begin with.
Another mind trap can be that you're not leaning into your strengths. The problem with other people's plans is that what works for someone else may not work for you. If you're naturally introverted and don't like to be on camera, making an Instagram video of yourself every day may not work for you like it does for other people. And that's okay. What's more important is knowing your strengths and leaning into them instead of leaning into other people's strengths.
Lastly, I see people falling into the mind trap of being stuck in what they think they 'should' be doing. When your following someone else's plan, you may be limiting yourself by thinking this is the only way it can work and get extra frustrated when it doesn't work for you. What are three other ways you could create the same result?
Reflection: Consider which mind trap you may be falling into (or another one altogether). Journal on how you'd want it to go in an ideal world. What's missing now? What can you change?
When you're frustrated that other people seem to be doing what you want and you aren't there yet
This one hurts. Especially when we're living in a world where people like to share their wins and successes online and not necessarily all of the work and failures that went into getting them there.
It can feel like you'll never get to the end goal and you just keep seeing more and more people who have already done it.
Then maybe you get sucked into scarcity thinking like 'well if they are all doing it there isn't any room left for me.'
Whether you're looking for your next job or starting a business, it hits similarly.
When you're stuck focusing on the outcome, you're not present to the journey itself.
Each of our journeys are unique. We each have unique things we need to learn based on who we are, how we were raised, and where we are headed.
When you're comparing your journey to someone else's outcome, you're comparing apples to oranges.
Reflection: At the end of each week or even day, reflect or journal on what your wins were. Keep track of these over time to be mindful of your journey and your learnings and progress along the way. Don't focus solely on the end goal, celebrate the small wins along the way.
Brittany is a life & leadership coach, trainer, and the founder of Hello Velocity where she helps ambitious individuals and corporate teams enhance their performance by working smarter, not harder. When she isn't building her business, you can find her planning her next travel adventure, taking a yoga or kickboxing class, or checking out a local brewery. She was recently acknowledged as one of the top coaches in Charlotte, NC.
